Of the three areas that make up our communication (words, vocal qualities, and physiology), many believe the last is the most important.  They say your body language, facial expressions and gestures express more meaning than your words. 

Professionals who read nonverbal communication regularly to enhance their understanding of people include law enforcement agents, counselors, jury selection consultants and speech analysis technicians.  However, you don’t have to be in one of those careers to have a grasp on the basics of body language.  Recognizing a few fundamentals will help you in reading people as well as effectively projecting your desired message to others.

Confidence:

Standing or sitting with shoulders back and chin up is the most confident posture.  Slouching, tucking your fists into crossed arms, or fidgeting are signs of unease.  While standing, keep your hands out of your pockets and your legs apart a bit.  It is good to steeple...

The communication we have with others is made of three components:  word choice, vocal qualities, and physiology.  The order of importance has been debated throughout the years, but one thing is agreed upon – each of the three plays a role.

Word choice: 

• Be concise.
• Be clear by articulating.
• Choose words your audience will understand.

Physiology:

• Be mindful of your facial expressions, gesture, and body language.
• Minimize nervous ticks or distracting physical habits.
• Remember the saying, “Actions speak louder than words.”  If you are using happy words, but your face looks angry or your posture looks sad, your joyful verbiage is likely to be dismissed.

Vocal qualities include: tone, word emphasis, speed and volume. 

You’ve heard people use tone to help make their point. Think of any time your parent, significant other, or teacher said your name – probably your full name, and said it with a strong, loud tone.  How did you...

Begin With Making Them Feel Good

While in a parking lot, walking from my car to the grocery store, I was approached by an elderly woman.  She was standing at her open trunk with her grocery cart parked right behind her car.

“You look strong.”  She said to me.  “Could you help me put this watermelon in my car?”

I was happy to oblige.  After getting her groceries nestled in her trunk, I bid her farewell and headed into the store.  I couldn’t help but think of her approach as I shopped.

Start with a compliment

Before I ran into her, I can’t remember a time when someone’s very first words to me included a compliment.  Even before I knew what was happening, I felt good, was smiling, and was happy to help before she even asked.  What a brilliant approach, I thought.  Make someone feel good right away.

How will you make people in your life feel good today?  This week?  This month?  There are...